Bring the Rain!

Just a quickie update...because if I don't get my cute butt out of bed and start helping my mother soon, she's going to have a hernia.

I have no idea whether I'm single or not right now. It's a terrible feeling. But all will be figured out tonight.

Xtina and I had a fabo reunion for two hours in the Applebee's parking lot and I've discovered that I have the amazing ability to make her laugh so hard she pees...for real. Bahaha

We found a SUPER CUTE apt in Wichita...Kendra and I put the deposit down on Tuesday :))) Pictures will follow as soon as we start moving things in.

It's almost July and I haven't set foot in chlorine yet which makes me terribly sad.

Dad is doing great and should be coming home Monday-ish :) Had lots of visitors...Gram&Kath, Nancy&Robert, Jeanie, Will&Sharon...

Our poor doggie Charlie got mauled by a freakin' malamute yesterday, apparently. Mom took him to the dog park and they always let in a few shelter dogs (since the dog park is behind the shelter). She looked up to where Charlie was and this horse of a dog had Charlie in his mouth and picked up off of the ground. It took four people to get the dog to let go and two of them were bitten in the process. Mom has no voice from screaming and my poor puppy dog is lethargic with gashes on his sides. The vet said they were superficial and should heal on their own, but he gave him pain meds and antibiotics and the shelter paid the vet bill. TRAUMATIC.

My hair is black again :) Thank Allah.

I'm going to Dallas over my "summer break" around the 7th of July and trying out for AMDA on the 10th....Staying with my best friend Carissa who just moved down there with her husband. So excited to have a semi-vacation!!! Then, of course, trekking BACK to Texas for the reunion! Word up, love my family :)A LOT has changed in two years....two years ago I was about to head off to KU, dating Jordan, a brunette, and about 15 lbs heavier...oh, and I had no fashion sense to save my life.

Possibly going to California for the first time in November for Kristin's wedding! Gotta see how much moneys I can get from financial aid, but I'm crossing my fingers!

Monica wants to go to Puerto Rico for spring break next year....I'm totally down for that :) Hopefully I will have a kickass job in Denver, KC, or Dallas by then. :))

I know that some of you read my blog and get worried....but don't worry TOO much...I usually only write when I'm upset...which isn't too terribly often. I just have nothing to say when I'm happy because..well...I'm happy :)

oxoxoxoxo

"Dressed head to toe in Love...the only label that never goes out of style." - Sex in the City

Kay. This is ridic.

The lack of stability in my life is now effecting my relationships with people. I don't feel like I can commit to a relationship that I KNOW I want because I feel like one stable thing in my life with throw off the balance of the overall instability which will just piss me off and make me yearn for stability even more. I have NO idea if that made any sense anywhere else besides inside my own brain, but run with it. I don't feel like I'm in one place, so I'm struggling with being with one person. I feel like...I feel like my own world has been thrown up in the air, scattered in the wind, and I'm trying to find all the small crappy pieces so I can put back together some semblance of sanity. It's so overwhelming when I stop and think about how much I drive, how much I cry, how angry I am all of the time. It's so infuriating. Especially since I have basically a zilch relationship with my mother at this point. I know that me not being completely and utterly in love with school stresses her out on top of her mother being sick and on top of her blatant irresponsibility with finances. But...I can't talk to her about a simple subject because she shuts down and freaks out and acts like the whole world is ending because dad or I asked a simple question. So I just don't talk anymore. She asks me questions, but I know she doesn't want the answer nor will she remember what I said the next day anyway (mostly because she's half listening, half wallowing).
Ugh. I'm tired. Goodnight.