Behind the Mask

It's been quite a while since I've written personally...my poetry has kind of taken over my blog! Silly girl, poetry is for emo kids. :) Not much is super new....I start CNA training on the 20th and I am really excited, but a wee bit nervous to be doing it all on my own. Mom got a new job in Virginia, so she and Dad (and the dog) leave Friday for three months. Crazy! I'll probably have to get my wisdom teeth out sometime in June or early July. Sick. Not excited. I met a new guy, but I'm not saying a word about it yet, so don't even ask.

That's pretty much it for now, I'm on my way to the movies with the afore-mentioned guy. So....goodnight! I'll write later.

Faith (04/12/09)

Your eyes wander sadly
I can feel your fear
Lacing my fingers with yours
So you know I'm here.

You're frozen, so scared
Not knowing how to jump
But I'll be beside you
To provide a little bump :)

We gaze into the abyss
Of the vast unknown
I'm jumping with you, dear -
You are not alone.

Let's go on an adventure!
The Excitement pleads
We'll face it together
Wherever it leads.

So unglue your feet, Freebird,
And spread your wings
Listen to the voice beside you
As she calmly sings:

Have faith in me, love
I have much in you
There are no limitations
To what you can do.

Let us fall freely
Into a world of understanding
Hold tight to me, darling -
Together we'll be landing.

Goodnight Love (04/07/09)

Lay your head on my shoulder
And forget about the day
All your worries and fears -
I'll kiss them away

Breath slowly
Calm your nerves
Wrap me in your arms
And hug every curve

I'm all the solace you need
When you come home at night
Enveloping you in my warmth
Melting away any fight

And after you fall asleep
I'll find comfort in your peace
Closing my eyes
On life, you are my lease.

Then when you wake with a start
For me, your eyes looking
I'll be right by your side
To face another morning.

New Love (04/05/09)

Feeling the warmth of his body
So near to mine
I reach for his hand
And trace every line.

His breath slows still
Body relaxing
Just some of his trust
Is all that I'm asking.

Eyes falling to mine
I watch as they plead
He presses his body
Conveying the need.

Pressing my lips
So firmly to his
I give over myself
And promise him this:

There's beauty and hate
Love and regret
But this one life
Is all that we get.

So I'll love you tonight
Tomorrow and ever
And keep you smiling
With all that is clever.

And if you will not smile
I'll kiss you all over
So you're aware
I'm all yours forever.

Opened Eyes (04/05/09)

Tunnel vision
As I stare at your face
Stone feet
As I struggle in place

Cold hands
When I touch your skin
Dead heart
When I whisper my sin

-And then one day I realize I'm better than this-

Sweeping gaze
Taking it all in
Deep breath
As I somehow begin

Warm hands
As I pull from your eyes
No tears
As I tell you goodbye.

Goodbye (04/03/09)

Taking a deep breath
I turn from your gaze
Feeling your eyes on my back
Through a teary haze

Finding the way
To utter those words to you
Wasn't a small task
But I deserved to be true

So as I say my goodbye
My feet grow heavy here
Not knowing what I am without you
But ready to face the fear

I'll love you without question
I'll speak to you without lies
But it's time to let go
Of the girl who always cries.

Waiting for a Rainbow (04/03/09)

There's a beating in my heart
That sounds faintly like a drum
Frantically pounding away
I try to make it slow
I try to make it stop
But strong it seems to be

(Waiting for your reply)

Will you tell me yes
Or will you just back down
Proving all your lies
Were truths all along
Will you smile at me
OR will you just turn away
Pardon me, but I'm still waiting.

I force myself to breath
One toxic breath
Smelling you from across the room
It's a scent so sticky
So hot and so sweet
That it makes me weak in the knees

(Waiting for your reply)

*Chorus*

Somewhere over the rainbow
I see skittles and my pot of gold
You standing there with a smile so bright
Shattered by a broken mirror.
RPTx1
(Waiting for your reply)

End (03/18/09)

I stare at you with no remakr
You disregard my silence
My eyes burn into your heart
You then start a sentence...

Begging me to speak
You reach out your palm
I stare down at it blankly
Wanting to hold it all along...

But it's time now for me to go
And say my final goodbye
To the man I loved so many times -
I struggle not to cry...

For it is neither his fault nor mine
That we shall never be
God has taken that chance away
As we begin to see

That we will love each other
Until the end of time
But our love cannot exist -
It can only rhyme.

Morning, O Morning (03/17/09)

Morning, O Morning
When dreams fade into night
Morning, O Morning
I welcome you with light.

Sun, O Sun
Shine in on me so bright.
Sun, O Sun
Such a friendly sight.

Birds, O Birds
Chirping cheerily so
Birds, O Birds
Perched up on the highest Bough

Morning, O Morning
There's love in your surrender
Morning, O Morning
Kiss my face so tender.

Love/Hate (01/2006)

You make me hot and tired.
You infuriate my very soul.
You ruin all my expectation
Of achieving any goal.
You blind me with your indifference.
You bury me with your hate.
There's no way around your body;
No key to unlock this gate.
I'm trapped here next to you,
Staring at your being -
Knowing just the frustration
Isn't all I'm seeing.
I raise my eyes to yours so deep -
It bothers how you know me.
I open my mouth to scold you -
Yet with a kiss, closed it shall be.
You disarm me with your passion.
You sooth me with your hands.
I can't resist your boyish charm -
I'm one of your biggest fans.
I love you without question
And speak to you without lies.
For who could hate such a man
That makes her feel so alive.

Small Absence (03/17/09)

Alone in the darkness
I reach out for your hand
Only to feel the emptyness
Of the rustling sheet beneath my palm.

It brings me back to the night you lay
So quietly in my soothing arms
And whispered all your dreams to me
And held me til the early morn.

Now you're gone away for a while
I miss you every second, dear
So hurry back into my bed
So I can hold you tight.

In a world where small absence lay
We must hold onto thoughts
To make it through one more minute
Until we see each other again.

Your Eyes (03/17/09)

Something in those eyes so dead
Reminds me where my heart has gone.
Somewhere in this world so vast
Love escapes my sorrow song.

And til t he day we meet again
I will be impatient then;
Slowly waiting for demise,
So I can smile back in his eyes.